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keitorin

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Dir en grey!!!!!! [18 Mar 2006|02:36am]
[ mood | excited / exhausted ]

OMFG I just got back from the first ever American Dir en grey Concert.... It was so fucking AWESOME.... omg I got to grab Toshiya's crotch and his bass... I also got to touch Kaoru's guitar, his hand, and his leg(so close to his crotch but no I missed) omg but I'm so jealous of Jon cause he got to feel up Kaoru(basically grab where I couldn't *cries* his crotch) omg Kyo was cool, he spit blood, Die looked awesome and played so well, Shinya was manly but was still so awesome, Kaoru has like this fuzz thing going (but it looks great)omg and last Toshiya didn't wear any make up... yet he was still so pretty *cries* this was like the best day of my life!

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^^ [05 Dec 2005|04:01am]
[ mood | tired ]

A poll thing I took from Puchu who took it from Jon, who took it from Kristen~

1. Nervous Habits: I bite my nails and scratch my arm
2. Are you double jointed: I believe my fingers on my right hand are
3. Can you roll your tongue: Yup, and I can't also do something else (not ment to be a perverted comment)
4. Can you raise one eyebrow: yup, my left eyebrow
5. Can you blow spit bubbles: kinda
6. Can you cross your eyes: yup
7. Tattoos: not yet
8. Piercings: do the ones in my ears count
9. Do you make your bed daily: no, I don't sleep under the covers

CLOTHES --
10. Which shoe goes on first: I believe my right one does
11. Speaking of shoes have you ever thrown one at anyone: *thinks back* yup
12. On the average, how much money do you carry: I try to have at least a 100 o.o
13. What jewelry do you wear 24/7: my 4 rings and my necklace
14. Favorite pieces of clothing: I don't, I guess jeans

FOOD --
15. Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it: I twirl
16. Have you ever eaten Spam: yup, and it's good
17. Favorite ice cream flavor: rocky road
18. How many cereals in your cabinet: 3, Fruity Pebbles, Special K , and Fruit Loops
19. What's your favorite beverage: Passion Fruit Juice
20. What's your favorite restaurant: ... I don't have one
21. Do you cook: yes, and it taste good^^

GROOMING --
22. How often do you brush your teeth: yup, every morning and night
23. Hair drying method: I let it air dry if I have time, blow dryer if I don't and then I straighten it
24. Have you ever colored / highlighted your hair?: yup

MANNERS --
25. Do you swear: yes, but I try to limit it when I'm around certain people
26. Do you ever spit: only when I'm sick


FAVORITE --
27. Animal: dogs, and tigers... don't know why tigers
28. Food: I don't have a favorite
29. Month: cold months, reminds me of Washington
30. Day: friday
31. Cartoon: Maria-sama ga Miteru
32. shoe brand: DCs
33. Subject in school: Math or HST
34. Color: purple
35. Sport: I like to play basketball and football, don't like to watch them though
36. TV show: CSI and Law & Order SVU

IN AND AROUND --
41. In the CD player: Crossfade
42. Person you talk most on the phone with: I don't call a lot of people...
43. Do you regularly check yourself out in store windows and mirrors: nope
44. What color is your bedroom: its a pinkish brown color
45. Window seat or aisle: aisle

LA LA LAND --
47. What's your sleeping position: On my right side or my back
48. Even in hot weather do you use a blanket? Yup
49. Do you snore: nope
50. Do you sleepwalk: nope, though once I woke up while getting out of bed
51. Do you talk in your sleep: I don't think so, but I've been told I do sometimes
53. What about with the light on: yes, I hate the dark... and if I don't the door to my room has to be wide open
54. Do you fall asleep with the TV or radio on?: I try no to because then its harder to hear my alarm but I do sometimes

CURRENTS --
55. Outfit: shirt and jeans
56. Worry: my back
58. Song: Tekesuta kousem - An Cafe
59. To do list: finish up my drives
60. Need and/or Want: the x-mas break to come

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> [23 Nov 2005|03:16pm]
I know I haven't updated in a while but thats because I'm on either myspace or Gaia.... Gaia is so addicting. Anyway... I hope everyone is enjoying their break
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[14 Oct 2005|07:41pm]
I got a myspace, I don't really know much about but I'm tring^^
http://www.myspace.com/xxkaitoxx
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[11 Oct 2005|05:34pm]
[ mood | happy ]

lol Puchu you are wrong my last post wasn't about the person you just found out about, this one is a secret even from jon and this person will stay that way!!! XDDD



O.O And on a side note....next time give me some warning before that happens again. You just blind sided my ass and scared the shit out of me... it was funny just a little random.

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[09 Oct 2005|05:14pm]
[ mood | scared ]

Why is it so hard to get over a "first" crush? I mean one second I think I'm over them and then turn around and I'm falling for them again. Its kinda sad that I just realized I've only really ever loved one person and I can't even bring myself to tell them that. I just thought I would move on but then I see them again and I want them. But its a relationship that I know isn't even possible. But I can't move on, I've tried. I wanna blame this all on you, every time I'm so close to getting away you bring me back. I don't think that you know what your doing to me. If lindsay can guess "because of the way I act", shouldn't you be able to tell I love you? I know you don't see me this way but I do wish you could. I don't think I could ever move on, I should but I can't bring myself to it. Thats the reason why I've only liked other people, because your the only one I want. I don't know what to do or say...

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Happy Birthday [09 Oct 2005|02:09pm]
Happy Birthday to Kao(22) & Mana(14 or 15?).
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[02 Oct 2005|08:23pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

I don't know what stops me. I hate it here, I hate everything. Why do I even continue to breath? Its funny the other day I was looking up self mutilation/ self hurt, THEY DON'T KNOW A FUCKING THING! I ACT PERFECTLY NORMAL DON'T I?! I WASN'T SEXUALLY ABUSED AS A CHILD, fuck I was never even spanked! Everyday I live through is the fucking same, SSDD. I mean I realize how easy it is just to end it all. I could slit my throat, cut my wrist and bleed out, hell I could fucking jump right in front of one of those cars the drive by our school every day. I will end it, even though I havn't brought myself to it yet, I'm on the edge. Will you let me jump or are you going to stop me. If you plan to do something, you might want to hurry. The sad truth is I now know what you are but you'll never be able to know or accept who I am, what I've become. I would give anything to be "normal" or at least what this fucking society calls normal. You have no idea how much you have til you lose it, will you remember me?

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[30 Sep 2005|07:40pm]
[ mood | cold ]

Yay I final found my cat beanie, but after you get past that you'd realize its a crappy weekend and its only friday night.

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FUCK [25 Sep 2005|09:17pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

I hated last week and now i feel all depressed! The one person I have/had a thing for is taken... and I just found out friday right before I was going to say something to them. I wanted to cry right there on the spot. T___T I also noticed... well my friends have noticed that hchs has changed me a lot. o.O Right now I hate school and ... i just noticed listening to All American Reject for like 4 days in a row with out looking at the lyric will help you to learn them XD ... but its kinda depressing so now I'm back to being depressed. I hate(j/k) how music just hits the nail on the head of your problems its like they know everything about you, lol. I guess life is full of disappointments, but haven't I had a lot already, can't I just get one break? Shit now I'm sounding all emoish, stupid Shane calling me emo and saying I cut my wrist... DO YOU SEE ANY FUCKING RED LINES ACROSS MY WRIST, WTF DO YOU WANT ME TO CUT MYSELF YOU FUCKING PRICK?! But then again Shane is cool sometimes its just that taking that your so emo and you cut/ you should go cut your wrist shit for a week is starting to get to me like when Michael kept talking about my sister on the bus last year. There's a time and place for that shit, and you've gone way past the point of my break I swear if Shane does it again I will find something and cut myself right in front of him and see what the fuck he does.

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[25 Sep 2005|01:33am]
[ mood | depressed ]

Another crappy weekend, and of many disappoints too. Hope this week goes by fast again too.

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Merciless Cult - Dir en grey [23 Sep 2005|09:39pm]
[ mood | obsessive ]

^^English
The pessimistic you The mercilles you
And the self loving you, What are you looking at?

With compargin and getting things in proportions you scream out mad
You wanted this ending to happen
You must be a romantistic

Gasp for breath 3X

Please love me, this blood and the meaning

But I jus remembered that there is no love here
Over and over somewhere begins to break

With compargin and getting things in proportions you scream out mad
You wanted this ending to happen
You must be a romantistic

Gasp for breath 4X
Please love me, this blood and the meaning

Gasp for breath 3X
Please love me, this day and this value

**Japanese
hikanteki na kimi to mujihi na kimi to
waga kawaii kimi wa soko de nani wo miteiru

hikaku to hirei no naka sakebi kurui hateru
omae ga nozonda ketsumatsu darou
sazokashi ROMANTISUTO nan darou ze

fui ni omoikaesu koko ni ai wo nai
kurikaeshi tsuranuku doko ka kowarete yuku

ai shite kudasai kono chi mo sono imi mo
ai shite kudasai kono hi ni kono kachi wo

gasp for breath

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I need at least one emo post XD [21 Sep 2005|12:25am]
[ mood | crushed ]

What happens when you want to end it all? Does someone come crushing in to try and stop you? Or do they just happen to walk in at the wrong moment and catch you? Why cut? Why bleed? Why try and hide it? Do you do it as an act of violence? Or just a fucking act of pity? Do you even know what the fuck your doing? Do you mean it when you try? Do you really wanna die? Was it because of being denied, or because someone lied? Is there really somewhere better then this place? But when you kill yourself isn't it considered disgrace? Do you know who you'll leave behind? Is it worth it in the end? If it were to end tonight would anyone care? If I did it for you would you care? Do I hide it well, from you? I guess I lie well enough for you. If I were gone tomorrow would you notice? I bet you wouldn't. Do you notice my hints? Am I that low compared to you? What makes me different from the rest of these people? I respected you. Don't be so greedy! I adored you but you will never know. I can't take it..., I love you. Wouldn't you say I've waited long enough? I'd do anything for you, I'd open up for you. I guess I still have a lot to prove, before we can move. But don't make me wait too long, I won't kill myself tonight, but i can't promise for much longer. Don't let me regret.... this

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Obsession of the Month or Week (havn't really decided yet) - 吉澤ひとみ ( Yoshizawa Hitomi) [20 Sep 2005|10:05pm]
[ mood | happy ]

Ok I can get very obsessive over things... so the obsession of the, time being is 吉澤ひとみ from Morning Musume. Last time it was well ... Die (dir en grey).
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very hard for me to chose sometimes!!! XD

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DAMN [17 Sep 2005|01:10am]
[ mood | depressed ]

I wasted a whole week, it was good but I still wasted it. I was supposed to do something monday - didn't go to school, was gonna do it tuesday - john didn't come to school (but there were unforeseen circumstances there), was going to do it wednesday - chickened out, going to do it thursday - panicked, and last but not least friday - ran out of time before the bell rang during passing period after lunch (shit i had like 20 secs to get to my class o.o). T_T I feel like a VERY pitiful person. And to add to that I felt like a fucking stalker tuesday, ahhh not cool!!! Damn I hate being a pushover, I hate being, well ... me.


Oh and Jon I was like this close to doing it, XD!!! *makes very little space between index finger and thumb*

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[15 Sep 2005|10:19pm]
[ mood | relaxed ]

I know this may seem dorky but when you were little (girls.. and some guys) did you listen to the Spice Girls? Well they've lost a member and I think (not sure but think) they broke up. But Melanie C (Sporty Spice) still makes music, and a lot of them sound really good when they mix them or turn them tecno. Some of her hits were "I Turn to You", "Never be the Same Again", and Northern Star (might be one word not to sure right now). And now I have found a new one and it sounds awsome if you get a chance to hear it.

Next Best Superstar


Sign a name, sign away every hour, every day
You're living your dream
Play the game; take the blame for the power and the fame
You're living your dream
Sell your life; sell your soul telling everyone you know
You're living your dream

And you know that you're good
Cause they told you you could be
The next best superstar
And you know you can sing
And you'll do anything to be
The next best superstar
You're the next best superstar

Make a joke; do the show, where does all the money go?
You're living your dream
Crack a smile in denial; throw your morals on the fire
You're living your dream
Sell your life; sell your soul telling everyone you know
You're living your dream

And you know that you're good
Cause they told you you could be
The next best superstar
And you know you can sing
And you'll do anything to be
The next best superstar
You're the next best superstar

Now you're broken
And how they brought you down
So now you're crawling out

And you know that you're good
Cause they told you you could be
The next best superstar
And you know you can sing
And you'll do anything to be
The next best superstar

And you know that you're good
Cause they told you you could be
The next best superstar
And you know you can sing

And you'll do anything to be
The next best superstar
The next best superstar

The next best superstar

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Happy Birthday [14 Sep 2005|05:24pm]
W00T TODAY IS MIYAVI'S BIRTHDAY .... AREN'T YOU ALL HAPPY? WELL IF YOUR NOT YOU SHOULD BE XD
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Songs [07 Sep 2005|11:47pm]
Have you ever heard a song and thought it just describe basically your whole life or your mood for that moment or maybe even one of your closest friends? If so ..... you need a life, j/k.


"Colors"

Can you feel it crush you does it seem to bring the worst in you out
There's no running away from these things that hold you down
Do they complicate you because they make you feel like this
of all the colors that you've shine this is surely not your best

But you should know these colors that you're shining are

[Chorus - x2:]
Surely not the best colors that you shine

I know you feel alone yeah and no one else can figure you out
But don't you ever turn away from the ones that help you down
Well they'd love to save you don't you know they love to see you smile
But these colors that you've shined are surely not your style

[Chorus - x2]

I know you feel alone yeah and no one else can figure you out
But don't you ever turn away from the ones that help you down
Well they'd love to save you don't you know they love to see you smile
But these colors that you've shined are surely not your style

I know your feeling like your lost
but you should know these Colors that your shining are
I know your feeling like your lost you feel you`ve drifted way to far
Did you know these colors that your shinin are.

[Chorus - x2]

Surley not the best..
(I know your feeling like your lost)
Colors that you shine..
(but you should know these Colors that your shining are)
Surley not the best..
(I know your feeling like your lost you feel you`ve drifted way to far)
Did you know these colors that your shinin are.
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[06 Sep 2005|09:45pm]
[ mood | excited ]

YAY I Finally got my Permit from the Driving school peps..... watch out people I'm a beginner, lol.

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[28 Aug 2005|10:18pm]
[ mood | gruntish ]

The first week of school went pretty good but I was disappointed that we're not allowed to have water anymore at school. I also thought it was just a North Side thing but I asked this girl in my driving class if they were not allowed to have water in their classes and she said they were allowed too so then that got me thinking.... if we're not allowed to have water at school, then why do they still sell it.

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